Advice on How To Get a Job – From Someone Who Has a Job

11:15 AM

The unspoken secret in life is that no one knows what they’re doing. The people we consider “smart” are just better at guessing what’s to come. The president, Heidi Klum, your mom – they’re all winging it. If you want to get what you want, more specifically a job, you just have to convince everyone else that you know what you’re doing. The world is a superficial place where we assume things based on what we’ve experienced or stereotypes we’ve learned. Your first impression is EVERYTHING. Everything.

I understand wanting to be a wild, free individual and not wanting to cater to society and give in to social norms – but having pink cotton candy hair is not the most important thing. Think about who has had pink hair – P!nk, Nicki Minaj, Katy Perry, circus performers. If you’re applying for positions similar to theirs, then go ahead and dye your hair, otherwise I’m not sure if I’d trust a Nicki Minaj look-alike doing my taxes.

For those of you freshly out of college looking for big kid jobs, or still in school looking for part time jobs, probably have heard lecture after lecture on how to make a good impression at your first interview. Here’s a list of hints and tips they didn’t tell you:

1. Be different. You want to have an identifying factor so that when you leave you’ll be “the girl who was wearing the Vanessa Mooney Handchain.” It’s also a great conversation piece.
2. Whiten your teeth. Whiter teeth make you seem more polished and put together.

Blazer3. Choose your colors carefully. Pastels make you look sweet. Brights make you look trendy. Black says you’re serious. I myself prefer black like the Elizabeth and James Plaid Rex Blazer. It’s a fresh update on your solid black blazers.
4. Make sure your technology is up to date. It’s a sad truth. You look more knowledgeable and with it if you have the latest version.
5. Bring something ironic. I myself have a Game Boy phone case. You can wear an unexpected brooch, pin or charm that displays your hobbies or interest. This is also a great conversation piece and could potentially spark a personal connection with your interviewer.
6. Practice a professional laugh. You know when you watch those first date scenarios and the girl is really cute until she laughs? Same thing applies in an interview.
7. Be excited but not too excited. It looks fake and forced if you’re overly enthusiastic. That’s a turnoff.

Olcay Gulsen8. Be tall. Wear your Olcay Gulsen sky high 6-inch pumps with Splendid Wide Leg Pants (be sure the pants sit about a quarter inch of the ground when you stand) to make yourself look extra tall. Tall people are perceived as more powerful.
9. Have a nice pen. It doesn’t matter if you can jot notes down in your phone. You look more professional with pen and paper. Just make sure it’s a fancy pen and pad.
10. Move slow. People who are sporadic and jittery look nervous and unsure. Be graceful and poised.

Now go use your connections, land yourself an interview and make everyone believe you know what you’re doing. It’s worked for me so far.

Yours truly,


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